Holding hands
by RoShell1978
Summary: She wants his hand back, as silly as it sounds. She can't seem to function with it. It's her lifeline, her comfort. It always has been, even in the beginning. Even when she fought tooth and nails against her feelings. A post 8x22 Crossfire one-shot
Disclaimer: I don't own it otherwise Stana would still be Beckett and we would have gotten a ninth season...

 **A/U: I guess I had to get onto the band wagon of the Castle Finale! After all the emotions from these past few weeks, I had to write something. Even if it's just for me, it could be cathartic... Someone told me it could be like therapy... So here it is...**

* * *

The world is fading. Seconds … minutes tick by. They've stopped trying to talk a few moments ago in an attempt to conserve whatever energy they've got left. Words of love and always still in the air, reinforced by the occasional squeeze of their intertwined fingers… _still here, still holding on_ …

There's a loud bang, the door being kicked down, heavy footsteps on the hardwood floor and then a hand, someone else's hand, touches her wrist. They seem satisfied with what they can still feel there because the next moment she can't feel his fingers anymore and she's lifted onto a stretcher and wheeled away.

She wants his hand back, as silly as it sounds. She can't seem to function with it. It's her lifeline, her comfort. It always has been, even in the beginning. Even when she fought tooth and nails against her feelings.

Memories come to mind as the world and the voices fade into the darkness…

 _a late night chat by the pool after 3XK escaped at the motel_

 _a desperate move as he yanks all the wires from the dirty bomb._

 _a disguised attempt at comfort while tending to an epileptic patient during an hostage situation_

 _a team work as they try to escape being eaten by a tiger_

 _a sweet circling motion to show how Royal likes to be pet_

 _a night on the couch listening to Martha's one woman show about her road to success_

 _a promise not to do it alone as they discover some new leads on her mother's murder_

 _the best handshake ever, even his palms are kinda sweaty_

 _a trip to the pool because none of them were her_

 _a whisper of a touch inside the jail cell because she never stopped believing in him_

 _his hand on her cheek to relax her while a filming crew follows their investigation_

 _a father's love for his new baby girl while waiting on any news for the kidnappers_

 _an angsty conversation on their swings that turned into the most unexpected and heartfelt proposal_

 _a bedside comfort while the toxins leave his body_

 _a high school dance while listening to their song_

 _a debriefing after some ice cold dunking torture_

 _another bedside comfort after a two months disappearance_

 _a perfect and intimate wedding ceremony_

 _his hand on her cheek to snap her out of the fact that she had to kill using a scalpel_

 _a time out from their time out as they celebrate their first anniversary_

She wants more. There has to be more for them. They promised each other always. She can't believe their always ends with them bleeding to death on their kitchen floor.

* * *

The first thing she hears is the steady beep-beep of a heart monitor. Only there seems to be two of them, creating cacophony and reassurance at the same time.

The next thing she's aware of is a hand holding hers and a thumb gently swiping her knuckles. Hope rises and she forces herself to open her eyes.

They immediately connect with blue ones. Ones she's known her entire life. They don't say a word. She doesn't need to ask. She knows everything is going to be okay; that they're going to be okay.

They'll still have a lifetime of holding hands to be had…

A walk on the Champs-Elysées and in the Montmartre neighbourhood

A dazzling sunset in Nepal

A pregnancy announcement during a hot-air balloon ride

Some misty eyed appointment while listening to the whoosh sound of the heartbeat.

Some painful contractions along with a tearful kiss after their daughter is born

And the best one yet: witnessing love as their baby girl grabs on to her husband's index finger as he says _Hi Lily… I'm your Daddy_

* * *

 **A/N: I know it's short and there's no dialogue but I wanted to focus on the symbolism of them holding hands in the last scene as well as the entire series.**

 **It might be the end but, as far as I'm concerned, they're still there. All I have to day is press play on one of those 173 episodes and they'll be there ... always!**


End file.
